Black while online dating…

So in a effort to be less antisocial than I’ve been, I decided to join other millennials in search for…well I’m not so sure what yet, but at the very least a warm body to come over once in a while and promptly leave just a quickly as he came (pun fully intended…yes, I’m gross but you already knew that…). With the internet making physical human interaction as so accessible,  we are living in world where more than half of your social circle is either on Tinder, Grinder, OK Cupid, Bumble and the ever, cringe-worthy POF ( I apologize to divorced soccer moms, weekend dads and sexy, single grandmas everywhere…but come on!). With all these tools at our disposal, it should more than easy to troll for your next victim. But as with everything related to the internet, Those dating sites are littered with thousands moronic assholes who can barely spell but can’t help let their inner misogynist/xenophobic/racists monologues in your inbox…What the fuck is a girl to do?!?!

I’ve tried Tinder, OK Cupid and Bumble  and I’ve blocked more people on those sites that I’ve actually rejected in real life. On the one hand, you could say that I’m extremely popular or it is because I’m scraping the bottom of the barrel for something that isn’t yet spoiled…or I could just come to terms that most men in my surrounding area want to experience what it’s like fucking/kissing/holding hands with a black girl. While some try to hide their fetishization (not very well), others seem to not give a flying fuck or realize that they are talking to an actual person. I can remember the first time this happened and thinking, well this is just a one off and I’ll just keep it pushin’ with my cute self. But it seemed like that one message opened the floodgates of literral hell. I will say 3 out of 5 messages are about the color of my skin and inquiry about how I like my pink meat. I mean, yes I’m aware that the anonymity of the internet has given a specific set of GIGANTIC balls to few, select keyboard warriors to spout as much ignorant bullshit as they can. But when it comes to a dating websites, what’s really the point? I mean the ultimate goal is to fuck, marry or kill someone, but either way isn’t the end of goal to meet someone off the fucking shit? If that’s the case, why the FUCK would I want to meet someone who not only doesn’t see me as a person, but merely as an attraction here to entertain his small dick (Total assumption, but I doubt I’m wrong about this…) and disgusting personality?

You’re probably thinking;  just block them and move on. Unfortunately, I’m too petty sometimes (ok, all the time) to not respond. I shouldn’t get tangled up in this but what I can say, I live for the drama of telling people off and it satisfies the small petty gnome that lives inside of me. At some point, people know that this is offensive, but continue to do it anyways. Some will argue white women and black women both go trough this, but I seriously asked myself how many of them get messages about  how “black women are more sexual than white women” or “how you black girls are great in bed”.Seems to me that my place in today’s culture has remained unchanged…here for consumption but not for appreciation…

*Illustration by Brad Amorosino*

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