As someone who dates (a lot), I often hear other friends who date (a lot) either complain that there is no one out there for them (7 billion people and really no one…how that math/logic works, I dunno but they swear…) and that they will end up alone for the rest of their days. I’d like to be the good friend and remind them they will never die alone and that I’ll be around to identify their remains once the cats have fed off their decaying carcasses. It does little to comfort them, but at least I’m trying. Obviously, my sense of humor leaves a lot to be desired but it does raise some serious questions for those of us who are in their 30’s or further along, with no kids or spouse in sight. Why are we so scared of dying alone?
I’ve never been afraid of being alone, in some aspects I actually prefer it. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve notice that I’m a little too comfortable being alone. I have to force myself to leave my house or be social. Now this obviously contradicts my “I date a lot” statement. But those of you that are quite astute, you’ll realized that I date a lot because it’s the easiest way to have my cake and eat it too; human companionship without the annoyance. It’s easier to have those boundaries in place when you’re not invested the daily lives of those you date. I know that most people date with an end goal, but I don’t have one…other than great sex and MAYBE companionship (I say maybe cause I get vexed easily, so there’s that…).
To me, dying alone is just another thing on the long list of things that I “should be worried about” as a single person. How about having to zip up a dress when there’s no one around. Or how about the time I twisted my ankle and couldn’t drive anywhere for about a week (Dancing, then falling into a manhole will do that…). Yet, I somehow managed to get along with life and do those things. Is more that we just want a witness to be there, so someone will remember and realized that we are not around?!? I understand the desire to be missed, especially for those of us, you know the lonely loners of the world. Whatever the case might be, whether you die alone or not, you will be remembered. The goal is to live a life well lived, love your friends and the family members that you CAN stand and be content with your life. Regret never saved anyone from dying…
*Illustration by Brad Amorosino*